Von darkomen.org/2014/11/16/letter…e-community-from-anthony/
In light of the events this past week, Anthony has written the following; it will only be posted temporarily, as this is a place for positive contributions. This letter is only from Anthony (not DOGC as a whole), and any questions concerns comments he would like directed to him, and not the club. We respect and support him for all that he has done since our inception, especially now.
As it turns out I do have something to say…
Over the past week I have received an immense amount of criticism; which I incurred rather quietly. During that time I also experienced a number of different emotions; as such I had been hesitant to engage or respond as further fueling the conversation seemed like it would only lead to extending an already negative conversation. However, where I draw the line and feel compelled to say something is where the criticism of my participation in a toy hobby turns personal, which it did during the latter part of the week.
With regard to the criticism of my play at WTC, and the specific question as to whether or not I made a willful attempt to take advantage of my opponent (in any match); I can say, without hesitation, that despite what it may appear like on a video, it is simply not true. Regardless of what anybody says on the internet, what is in my mind and heart can not be discerned by a slice of video tape. Does that mean it excuses my poor execution, or mishandling of models? Of course not. Am I embarrassed of what that portrays about my play of the game in those moments? Absolutely. Does any of that give someone a license to snip a few seconds of my life out and make judgments of my character and continually spread them across multiple mediums so much so it ends up in snarky exchanges with my family? That is where a line is very much crossed; it is not acceptable and will not be tolerated.
While I could spend my effort here defending each documented accusation of my play; I believe the most proper thing to do would be to tell those who feel they need an explanation to seek out my opponent, the only person actually involved in the game with me, and ask his opinion; you might be surprised to hear his answer. The fact is he and I have reviewed the game together and he still feels that we had an enjoyable match, looks forward to spending time at a table with me again, and thinks all of what has ensued is very unfair. But why should his opinion matter when someone can look at a video and decide they know more than anyone actually involved? As has already been made painfully clear, we all get to pick and choose the facts we want to tell the story; so instead many have been choosing to use this as a means to attack my character extending far beyond this niche hobby. Deciding that my efforts to raise thousands of dollars for charity (in the name of this game), run a community organization, be a public servant in my local municipality, help raise two children, volunteer my time to answer literally hundreds of emails and PMs, write articles at request and do things to positively influence the people, game and community around me means far far less than a snapshot of some games I played. I, unfortunately, had to read where somebody literally proclaimed that all of those things mean nothing because a few seconds during a tabletop war game justify them publicly disapproving of who I am as a human being due to the appearance of impropriety; all, of course, without actually contacting me directly.
Somehow, in spite of all this, I’m still portrayed as the lone guilty antagonist. Not only are these same people looking to further punish me, they are looking to punish those associated with me. How much more confused can this be? To say I’m disappointed in what has happened this week would be a gross understatement, it would be more accurate to say I’m truly concerned with what all of this says about the community. Was taking the tedious time detailing my failings on video, time stamped by the second, really intended on bringing something positive to this hobby? Did the people who contributed to this really think this was going to inspire better play or an improved community? How exactly? Inciting mob mentality, arguments, insults, and personal attacks is what actually occurred. Whom did that benefit? Perhaps the hope was to drive a player out of the game? I would ask why? Is the game so populated it needs one less player? None of that seems like anything related to the hobby was improved by this conversation. A better argument can be made that it’s quite possibly set the community back and left us more divided. If somebody had concerns that needed to be expressed, there are many many ways they could have done so in a significantly more appropriate manner that would not have degenerated into negative exchanges with those in my personal life. That behavior is inexcusable, and I cannot impress that upon those reading this enough.
It has been brought to my attention that there are some waiting for a response on this matter from other people in the community…why? The people at the table saw no reason for additional cause for concern, nor have either of us been directly asked for our perspective, so far as I know, by those being asked to levy an opinion. So why are people who have nothing to do with any of the games played being allowed to demand anything? Why is this type of hate mongering behavior being given credence? I’ll make it easy for those involved, and say that I do not plan to return to any competitive event, domestic or national for some time. I won’t be applying for inclusion on anything game related, nor am I sure I will continue to play the game competitively again in the future. I’ll make that decision in my own time. The greater cause for concern is that anyone who is in a position to be an organizer, of any type, for the hobby would actually succumb to this type of pressure. It would be a bad precedent to set that inciting a mob of anger actually dictates results. I have a great deal of respect for the people that spend the time, energy, and sometimes personal dollars to give us great events to participate in, however I would be extremely disappointed if they responded favorably to this type of poor exhibition. Furthermore, considering punishment of people who have simply played along side me, is completely unfounded and ludicrous. To what end? I have known all those organizers involved to bring progress and positive influence to the hobby; what, at all, would hurting those players affect positively? You know the answer; do the right thing, chastise this cancerous community behavior, and let the games be played by the people at the table.
This is a toy hobby, that should only make up a small part of our lives; I would hope we all remember that. There are no paid professionals, we are all volunteers who spend our time and expendable income to enjoy this as a pastime. If a player chooses to appear on a video, it should not mean those that view the videos have an open license to abuse who and what they see (regardless of whether they approve or not) and it should certainly be intolerable to attack people personally as a result. I wouldn’t think that has to be said, but it’s painfully apparent that it does. The privilege of viewing these videos is very much in peril, and the community would do well to remember that no player is obligated to do it. What happened to me this week was extremely out of line; and it’s not going to encourage players to want to play this game, and certainly will not make them want to do it on camera. Some part of me would like to believe that criticism and punishment of the people who made derogatory comments to people in my personal life would be sought with as much vigor and malice as I was for making mistakes in a toy game. In all earnest we know that won’t happen, and the unfortunate part is that I still have to actually address this, and there isn’t an internet mob of support to bear down on those people. To be clear i’m not asking for this to happen, only clarifying the type of humanity that should be expected from each other; we would all do well to keep that in perspective.
I have sincerely made an effort to be a positive part of the things that surround me in my life, including this hobby and community. I have enjoyed my time competing around the world during the last two years, and the friends and memories I have made will always be with me. Until this week I had no regrets of my time spent; and regardless of this week or anything that comes after nobody can take those away from me. I stated at the beginning that I experienced a wide range of emotion this week, from anger and embarrassment, and now to appreciation and understanding. My frustration with why all this happened has gone; I’m aware of my role in it, and indeed do feel badly. What’s important to know is I’m now actually thankful it was me, and not another player, especially one that I might call a friend. Nobody deserves what I experienced this week. If this does mark the end of this chapter for me, I would hope that it’s used as an example of what we don’t want. Having concerns and criticisms of each other in a game is fine, so long as it’s handled with dignity and respect. I’d like to believe we can all agree on that.
To those people who reached out to me over the last several days, and gave me public or private support, you have my sincerest gratitude; you know who you are, and more importantly I now know who you are as well. Your words of friendship mean more than you know.Conversely to those who took this opportunity to pile on when I was down, or worse to do so covertly; I know who you are as well. I’m disappointed our friendship was only a matter of convenience.
As I bring my thoughts to a close, I can say with sincere conviction that these will be my last public comments about any of this. I am available, as I always have been, to those who wants to discuss anything with me directly and privately; I’ll continue to be reasonably open to questions and feedback. Whether I’m part of it or not, I hope this hobby continues to grow and prosper. Too many good people I care about play it for me to feel any other way. I hope my comments here bring some closure to this, and while I’m sure it will incite further discussion, I hope it can be kept to a respectable level that we can all move on from.
Finally, to my nerd family, if we do not see each other across a table again, please don’t be sad. None of us will play these games forever, and I’m extremely thankful for the time I’ve had with you… all of it, truly.
A.
In light of the events this past week, Anthony has written the following; it will only be posted temporarily, as this is a place for positive contributions. This letter is only from Anthony (not DOGC as a whole), and any questions concerns comments he would like directed to him, and not the club. We respect and support him for all that he has done since our inception, especially now.
As it turns out I do have something to say…
Over the past week I have received an immense amount of criticism; which I incurred rather quietly. During that time I also experienced a number of different emotions; as such I had been hesitant to engage or respond as further fueling the conversation seemed like it would only lead to extending an already negative conversation. However, where I draw the line and feel compelled to say something is where the criticism of my participation in a toy hobby turns personal, which it did during the latter part of the week.
With regard to the criticism of my play at WTC, and the specific question as to whether or not I made a willful attempt to take advantage of my opponent (in any match); I can say, without hesitation, that despite what it may appear like on a video, it is simply not true. Regardless of what anybody says on the internet, what is in my mind and heart can not be discerned by a slice of video tape. Does that mean it excuses my poor execution, or mishandling of models? Of course not. Am I embarrassed of what that portrays about my play of the game in those moments? Absolutely. Does any of that give someone a license to snip a few seconds of my life out and make judgments of my character and continually spread them across multiple mediums so much so it ends up in snarky exchanges with my family? That is where a line is very much crossed; it is not acceptable and will not be tolerated.
While I could spend my effort here defending each documented accusation of my play; I believe the most proper thing to do would be to tell those who feel they need an explanation to seek out my opponent, the only person actually involved in the game with me, and ask his opinion; you might be surprised to hear his answer. The fact is he and I have reviewed the game together and he still feels that we had an enjoyable match, looks forward to spending time at a table with me again, and thinks all of what has ensued is very unfair. But why should his opinion matter when someone can look at a video and decide they know more than anyone actually involved? As has already been made painfully clear, we all get to pick and choose the facts we want to tell the story; so instead many have been choosing to use this as a means to attack my character extending far beyond this niche hobby. Deciding that my efforts to raise thousands of dollars for charity (in the name of this game), run a community organization, be a public servant in my local municipality, help raise two children, volunteer my time to answer literally hundreds of emails and PMs, write articles at request and do things to positively influence the people, game and community around me means far far less than a snapshot of some games I played. I, unfortunately, had to read where somebody literally proclaimed that all of those things mean nothing because a few seconds during a tabletop war game justify them publicly disapproving of who I am as a human being due to the appearance of impropriety; all, of course, without actually contacting me directly.
Somehow, in spite of all this, I’m still portrayed as the lone guilty antagonist. Not only are these same people looking to further punish me, they are looking to punish those associated with me. How much more confused can this be? To say I’m disappointed in what has happened this week would be a gross understatement, it would be more accurate to say I’m truly concerned with what all of this says about the community. Was taking the tedious time detailing my failings on video, time stamped by the second, really intended on bringing something positive to this hobby? Did the people who contributed to this really think this was going to inspire better play or an improved community? How exactly? Inciting mob mentality, arguments, insults, and personal attacks is what actually occurred. Whom did that benefit? Perhaps the hope was to drive a player out of the game? I would ask why? Is the game so populated it needs one less player? None of that seems like anything related to the hobby was improved by this conversation. A better argument can be made that it’s quite possibly set the community back and left us more divided. If somebody had concerns that needed to be expressed, there are many many ways they could have done so in a significantly more appropriate manner that would not have degenerated into negative exchanges with those in my personal life. That behavior is inexcusable, and I cannot impress that upon those reading this enough.
It has been brought to my attention that there are some waiting for a response on this matter from other people in the community…why? The people at the table saw no reason for additional cause for concern, nor have either of us been directly asked for our perspective, so far as I know, by those being asked to levy an opinion. So why are people who have nothing to do with any of the games played being allowed to demand anything? Why is this type of hate mongering behavior being given credence? I’ll make it easy for those involved, and say that I do not plan to return to any competitive event, domestic or national for some time. I won’t be applying for inclusion on anything game related, nor am I sure I will continue to play the game competitively again in the future. I’ll make that decision in my own time. The greater cause for concern is that anyone who is in a position to be an organizer, of any type, for the hobby would actually succumb to this type of pressure. It would be a bad precedent to set that inciting a mob of anger actually dictates results. I have a great deal of respect for the people that spend the time, energy, and sometimes personal dollars to give us great events to participate in, however I would be extremely disappointed if they responded favorably to this type of poor exhibition. Furthermore, considering punishment of people who have simply played along side me, is completely unfounded and ludicrous. To what end? I have known all those organizers involved to bring progress and positive influence to the hobby; what, at all, would hurting those players affect positively? You know the answer; do the right thing, chastise this cancerous community behavior, and let the games be played by the people at the table.
This is a toy hobby, that should only make up a small part of our lives; I would hope we all remember that. There are no paid professionals, we are all volunteers who spend our time and expendable income to enjoy this as a pastime. If a player chooses to appear on a video, it should not mean those that view the videos have an open license to abuse who and what they see (regardless of whether they approve or not) and it should certainly be intolerable to attack people personally as a result. I wouldn’t think that has to be said, but it’s painfully apparent that it does. The privilege of viewing these videos is very much in peril, and the community would do well to remember that no player is obligated to do it. What happened to me this week was extremely out of line; and it’s not going to encourage players to want to play this game, and certainly will not make them want to do it on camera. Some part of me would like to believe that criticism and punishment of the people who made derogatory comments to people in my personal life would be sought with as much vigor and malice as I was for making mistakes in a toy game. In all earnest we know that won’t happen, and the unfortunate part is that I still have to actually address this, and there isn’t an internet mob of support to bear down on those people. To be clear i’m not asking for this to happen, only clarifying the type of humanity that should be expected from each other; we would all do well to keep that in perspective.
I have sincerely made an effort to be a positive part of the things that surround me in my life, including this hobby and community. I have enjoyed my time competing around the world during the last two years, and the friends and memories I have made will always be with me. Until this week I had no regrets of my time spent; and regardless of this week or anything that comes after nobody can take those away from me. I stated at the beginning that I experienced a wide range of emotion this week, from anger and embarrassment, and now to appreciation and understanding. My frustration with why all this happened has gone; I’m aware of my role in it, and indeed do feel badly. What’s important to know is I’m now actually thankful it was me, and not another player, especially one that I might call a friend. Nobody deserves what I experienced this week. If this does mark the end of this chapter for me, I would hope that it’s used as an example of what we don’t want. Having concerns and criticisms of each other in a game is fine, so long as it’s handled with dignity and respect. I’d like to believe we can all agree on that.
To those people who reached out to me over the last several days, and gave me public or private support, you have my sincerest gratitude; you know who you are, and more importantly I now know who you are as well. Your words of friendship mean more than you know.Conversely to those who took this opportunity to pile on when I was down, or worse to do so covertly; I know who you are as well. I’m disappointed our friendship was only a matter of convenience.
As I bring my thoughts to a close, I can say with sincere conviction that these will be my last public comments about any of this. I am available, as I always have been, to those who wants to discuss anything with me directly and privately; I’ll continue to be reasonably open to questions and feedback. Whether I’m part of it or not, I hope this hobby continues to grow and prosper. Too many good people I care about play it for me to feel any other way. I hope my comments here bring some closure to this, and while I’m sure it will incite further discussion, I hope it can be kept to a respectable level that we can all move on from.
Finally, to my nerd family, if we do not see each other across a table again, please don’t be sad. None of us will play these games forever, and I’m extremely thankful for the time I’ve had with you… all of it, truly.
A.
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